𫳠Letting go

Rewind 15 years and you wouldnāt recognize the person writing this today. Life for me; like most teenagers, was filled with angst, narcissism, and blissfully unaware of what lay ahead. My favorite books growing up were Rich Dad Poor Dad, 4-Hour Workweek, and The Abs Diet. I wanted the ability to give myself the life Iāve always dreamed of and I spent my first 5 years realizing that I couldnāt do it on my own.
Today Iām a much happier person, all due to my friends, colleagues, and mentors that have helped me become a better person over the years. You see, I learned that on my own I was fast but I never went far. When I realized that life was less about moving fast on my own and more about going far with others my results went up significantly.
āļø Quote of the week:
āNothing in nature blooms all year long.ā
š¶ Song of the week:
Looking for Love by Nick Martin
š What Iām reading:
The Courage to be Disliked by Fumitake Koga
š§ Top 3 learnings:
š“ Dr. Phil - I was listening to Dr. Phil talk about his show and all the crazy characters heās had on it. He went on to explain that a large majority of people on his show donāt go on to better themselves. In fact, they put themselves into worse situations after the fact. But itās what he said next that made me rethink how great of a person Dr. Phil is. He said itās not about the people on the show that get the help they need. Itās more about the viewers watching the show and reflecting on their own situation. When you see a drug addict on the show talk about how bad his life got and how it impacts those around him it creates a bond with the viewers. If youāre not a drug addict, you tend to look at it as relief, thinking āman, at least my life isnāt that badā. If you are a drug addict, then you watch with anxiety, as it hits close to your own life.
Dr. Phil gets lots of calls and emails about how an episode that someone watched changed their life. That they saw someone in a similar situation to them and reversed it to ānot be like that guy on TVā. It's really easy to see these types of reality talk shows as trash TV but I found it interesting how some people see them as entertainment and some see them as truth in themselves.
𫳠Let go or be dragged - This saying helped me be a better person. I tend to overthink a lot. Thoughts like ādo you think they noticed I made that mistakeā, āam I talking too loudā, and āwill that person take what Iām saying the wrong wayā. My life is filled with these thoughts 24/7. But something I learned is that these thoughts donāt help me or improve my life in any way. I often say to myself āif Iāve planned the best I can, and did my honest best, then what will worrying about it improve?ā So said simply, let go of what you can't control or be dragged by the unknown. Just know that there are millions of unknowns out there and it's exhausting thinking of every single one.
Two-tone approach - Two people can hear the exact same song but hear things entirely different from one another. One person might hear the drums and bass lines, and another might focus on the lyrics. The same can be done about problems. Something I learned a long time ago was that everybody solves problems differently. This isnāt to say that one person is doing it the wrong way. The result may be the same but the paths to get there can be vastly different. One may be shorter or both might take the exact amount of time with the same level of effort. The thing I find interesting is understanding how others view the world because it opens you up to understand a different view of problem-solving.
š Designer thoughts:
You need to detach your design from yourself. So if the designer fails the design doesnāt fall with you, and vice versa.
Designers and artists fail all the time but itās because they can detach those failures from their identity can they really examine how theyāve failed.
You see people who link failure to their identity donāt go far because theyāve made it about who they are. But when you view failure as an external situation rather than internal you can start to dissect how and why youāve failed. Making it much more informative so that you can influence that skill for next time.
š“ Dad thoughts
My daughter really looks up to me and itās so odd. When she gets scared sheāll ask me to hold her, when she has trouble building her lego tower she asks me for help. Like Iām the adult now. Up until a few years ago, I use to look for other adults to ask for help. Now Iām the one people turn to when they ask for help. Nothing really profound about it. Itās true what they say. Every year after age 19 doesnāt really feel like Iām older than 19. I now get broader ideas, I have strong growth in my career, and I even own a house, but for some reason, in my head, Iām still that same 19-year-old kid trying to figure everything out. I get my 19-year-old self ready in the morning, I answer a few emails, I look at my 19-year-old self in the mirror and I donāt see a 19-year-old me staring back. Time is a bitch.
Have a great week!
š¬ PS: Please do reply to this email if you have anything to add / or any questions. I quite enjoy replying to comments/emails as a source of procrastination from revision.
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